Recently someone went out of their way to leave two rude comments on my blog. One being “you look old and tired” and one about how I should change the way I write my posts. First off, this was clearly the same person (same IP address and was left one minute after the other) but they went out of their way to create different names and e-mail addresses to leave the comment.
I don’t usually get hate/mean messages, but I wanted to address this since the person responded to my reaction with “Let me offer another thought; I’ve been following you since MySpace. You were fresh and interesting with finding vintage treasures and putting them together. Now it seems all you do is advertise products and clothing different brands sell. Feels very robotic and uninteresting.”“. I understand I have followers that have followed me since Myspace. What I don’t think some of those followers understand is this is no longer Myspace, and I’m no longer 16 and thirfting when.. ya know, I’m not in High School or at my parents house. I’m 25, and running two businesses.
I can’t even begin to understand how you can compare 16 year old me from Myspace, to me now at 25. I understand that people who have followed me since then have a certain light they see me in, and expect me to stay there. I want to not have that burden and be able to change and grow as a person without judgement. Don’t get me wrong, I loved 16 year old, free spirited Nicole, but I’d rather live life for myself, and not strangers on the internet, and continue to change and grow.
I traveled overseas for a few months with friends before the age of 20 (and no, this was not paid for on daddy’s credit card either). I then moved to Park Slope, Brooklyn, at the age of 21, with little money and no job, and made it in NYC. After that, I lived in Williamsburg for a bit, then by the age of 23, I was living A L O N E in a T W O bedroom apartment in the heart of Greenpoint, Brooklyn. (If you know anything about NYC living, you know that most people live with roomates until they’re married because of how expensive rent is.) So yes, I had an entire room for a walk in closet in my Brooklyn apartment at the age of 23 and damn proud of it. I’ve worked for amazing companies, have never spent a cent on school, opened up my own vintage boutique now at the age of 25, and still get amazing job offers that people would kill for. So yes, maybe I do look “old and tired” now. But you know what, I AM OLD AND TIRED, and I’m so thankful for that. If I wasn’t the age I am now, I wouldn’t have experienced and learned everything I have thus far, nor would I be where I am today: exhausted, and so fucking happy.
I understand how my Myspace and my blog are nothing alike. This is for more than a million reasons. I invest 24/7 into my blog and social media. This is a business, so it will feel like advertising at some points, yes. That is the truth to any fashion blog. Looking back, myspace was a stepping stone to what no one knew was going to become a job one day. I started documenting my style (yes, mostly all vintage) at age 16 on there, and continued to do so onto Tumblr, Blogspot, and now invested over $500 on a new design for WordPress. So as much as I can make money off my blog, I sure as hell put money back into it.
Posts will never feel as creative as they did when I was 16 and posting what I found thirfting and hanging out with friends because now I try to post clothes that girls can actually buy (while usually showing them how they can mix vintage with the piece) and I don’t have as much time to hang out with friends while running two businesses. I also have the opportunity to work with hundreds of designers I loved and couldn’t afford growing up, so why deny myself that when I worked so hard getting to this point?
With this post I feel so confident going through with my hair cut, and chopping off my long locks I’ve had since “the myspace days”. The last thing I’d ever want is to still be exactly who I was at 16, and doing the same thing as I was back then. I don’t usually brag about my accomplishments, but I am very proud of everything I’ve done thus far, and can not wait to see what is next.
Remember, always live for yourself. You will never be able to make everyone happy. Always move forward and continue to learn and grow from every experience. Leave those negative people and vibes b e h i n d y o u.